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Narcissistic abuse is full of hurt, lies, manipulation, and confusion. This article will explore the signs you’re healing from narcissistic abuse, and what to expect next.
I like to think of each sign as a milestone within my healing journey; each one helped me recognise my progress and find inner strength and motivation to continue moving forward.
Are you ready to take the first step for a healthier, more authentic and empowered version of yourself?
It’s not good enough to just survive, I’m here to show you how to thrive! Here is my ultimate guide.
Here are the Signs You’re Healing From Narcissistic Abuse
Step 1. Accepting the reality
The first step to healing and signs your healing from narcissistic abuse is acceptance. If you can truly acknowledge that the abuse happened, and you can see the abusive behaviour for what it is, then congratulations. This is a massive step into your healing journey. It can be scary at this stage, but if you have stopped making excuses for their bad behaviour and believing all their non-sense, this shows ultimate power and you are capable of anything from here!
2. Don’t forget to grieve
When you eventually take that step forward and come to terms with the fact that this person you perceived as caring, loving and had your best interest, is actually manipulative, evil and abusive, it’s hard. Believe me, I hear you.
But now you can see the abuse for what it is, disconnect from the illusion of safety and start to grieve the loss of a relationship that never existed. You will go through a rollercoaster of emotions such as denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Allow yourself to feel these emotions.
3. You feel a weight has been lifted
At times you may be asking yourself, why did i start all this, or it’s easier to just put up with the abuse… quite honestly, I had numerous days like this. But nothing compares to the feeling when you eventually go no contact, or lower the contact with the narcissist. You will immediately feel a weight has been lifted.
4.Learning to love yourself
Beginning to put yourself first is the first step to learning to love yourself. You will start to prioritise your needs, self-care and do things that make you happy. At this stage you will care less and less about what narcissists think of you, and focus more about what you can control.
5. Enjoying solitude
Sitting in solitude is a powerful thing and is yet another sign you are healing from your past. Understanding your values, your likes and dislikes is a massive milestone.
6. Become highly vigilant to narcissistic tendencies
You will become highly sensitive or vigilant to narcissistic tendencies. This is a good thing, as it’s your mind healing and warning you to protect yourself from another potential toxic relationship. At this point, you may think of the world an untrustworthy place to be, feel deceived or naive to so much of your past, but this is just a stage and you will accept, learn and grow.
I like to think of this as my superpower, it gives me the ability to protect myself and sense abuse so I can take control of who/where I spend my time. When you begin to surround yourself with healthy, trusting relationships, it will become easier over time.
7. Your health improves
Abuse often triggers many different emotions and health problems. At this stage you can find the headaches, insomnia, fatigue, skin issues, digestion problems, and low mood will start to disappear as you find yourself again.
8.Decreased guilt
Projection is a common trait of a narcissistic relationship. It’s when a narcissist portrays their insecurities, faults and shame onto you. A sign of healing from narcissistic abuse is a reduction in guilt, and you stop taking responsibility for their actions, self-blame or lack self-worth.
9. Reduced fear and anxiety:
Fear, anxiety and depression are all symptoms of someone who has or is presently experiencing abuse. When you’re in an abusive relationship, you will feel trapped and as if you’re walking on eggshells.
You may find you were living on a rollercoaster of emotion, waiting for the next spell of rage, then praying they’re in a good mood the next. While you no longer have to deal with this, it can take time for your mind and body to adapt to feeling safe around people.
10.Memories Start To Fade
A sign that you are on the right path is when you delete old text messages, photos, following their social media and start to focus on your life.
11. Inner peace
This is when you begin to find peace and calmness in your life, you become less tense or on edge, and you start to take comfort in the small things. This stage is when you feel nothing other than calmness, all the anger, fear and worry begins to fade away. I remember at this stage, I had this feeling of calmness, but my mind was scanning for things to worry about as it felt too good to be true. Take time to validate and comfort yourself during this period.
12.Confidence boost
The inner peace soon gives your self-esteem a boost, when you remove toxic energy from your circle, you will naturally see your mood uplift and flourish in confidence. All of a sudden the time you spent worrying can now be spent on learning new skills, improving your well-being, new interests and hobbies.
12. Assertiveness
This is when your healing journey is in full swing; your life is starting to thrive and you know exactly what you want, and you become clear and concise when communicating this to others.
You no longer tolerate people disrespecting your boundaries, and you have no problem standing up for yourself, giving your opinion or preference to others.
13. Forgive yourself
This is when you reflect and you start to put your past learnings into practice. You can now move on, forgive yourself, stop self-sabotaging and be kind to yourself. Once you’ve done this, you can then forgive the narcissist; this doesn’t mean that you welcome them back, but it means you can release any anger or resentment toward them so you can move on.
14.Optimistic about your future:
Lastly, your future begins to look bright and you’re excited for the next chapter. You begin to set goals, feel motivated and inspired by those around you. This is one of the main signs you’re healing from narcissistic abuse and is key to moving on with your life.
If you are suffering or have suffered at the hands of a narcissist, you may benefit from speaking to a therapist. A therapist can help you identify triggers and thought patterns which may be impacting your mental health, to work on coping strategies. Many of our followers have had great success using Online Therapy to overcome anxiety issues as a result of narcissistic abuse. We have have a 20% offer currently running for Online Therapy.
Why not check out some of our other articles such as 7 steps to heal yourself from narcissistic abuse or How to go no contact with a narcissist to help with your recovery. When I learned I was a victim of narcissism, these therapists channels on YouTube were invaluable in aiding my recovery.